Post by bahnoo on Dec 23, 2007 0:06:30 GMT 7
I got this post in sbf.
Report from The New Paper dated Monday 14 May 2007 :-
I gave up everything for love - Former civil servant recalls how Geylang prostitute became his wife This report inspired a reader to tell us his own love story with a Thai girl
IT may be hard to understand why he chose to give up so much for someone who sold her body for money.
He resigned from his civil service job, turned his back on a flashy lifestyle and left Singapore, just to marry the Thai national, in 2002.
He ended up jobless in Bangkok, with his wife supporting him and their two children.
Now back and working at two jobs here, Ben, 35, just wants to be with his wife, 30, who used to be a sex worker in Geylang.
His parents are still clueless about his wife's past.
Ben, who asked that his real name be withheld, fears they won't be able to live with the stigma. He told The New Paper on Sunday: 'I will never tell them. I will keep this secret as long as I am alive.'
The diploma holder was moved by the love story of Singaporean Wai Keen Weng.
Mr Wai, a 32-year-old delivery man, used up all his savings to fight for the release of his Thai fiancee, Amue Athu, a former sex worker serving a one-year jail sentence for entering Singapore illegally.
Mr Wai claimed that Amue, 24, was a victim of human trafficking and had been forced into prostitution. He is still trying to stop her from being deported, by appealing to the President.
It was their story that inspired Ben to call The New Paper on Sunday to share his own.
Like Mr Wai, who used to have a lucrative job in a family business, Ben had everything going for him.
He used to drive fancy cars and splurged on branded goods, he claimed, and dated attractive air stewardesses and professionals.
But his life changed when he met the Thai prostitute.
Ben said: 'I have tried to apply for my wife's long-term stay in Singapore but was rejected twice.
'Since she is not welcome in Singapore, I was willing to give up everything here to be with her in Bangkok.'
He quit his job, sold his car and left.
He said his relatives and friends are still puzzled over the sudden move.
Only one person, his best friend, knows the reason.
Ben's best friend, who wanted to be known only as MrLim, said: 'I was shocked when he first told me that he wanted to marry a prostitute.
'But after he explained to me why he loves her so much, I tried to understand and support him.
'He's a grown-up and I trust that he has thought about it thoroughly.'
Mr Lim, 28, a civil servant, has met Ben's wife on a few occasions. He said she came across as friendly and polite.
Ben first met his wife in a Geylang brothel in 2002. He had gone there with a group of friends.
PAID $130 A NIGHT
He was smitten by her good looks and paid $130 to spend a night with her. Then they exchanged phone numbers.
She called him later and they kept in touch by phone.
On a day she was not working, Ben took her to Sentosa.
'She wore a casual long-sleeved blouse and jeans, nothing sexy.
'Although she speaks little English, we were able to understand each other and we had a great day together,' he recalled.
He visited her a week later. And paid to have sex with her.
She had only one day off in a month. So whenever he wanted to see her, he had to go to the brothel.
Soon, Ben found himself back at the brothel every night.
But they did not have sex every night, he said. Sometimes, they just chatted throughout the night.
Unlike other women he has known, he said she cooked for him and showered him with care and love.
She would buy him shirts and plenty of essence of chicken. Ben was touched.
'She cares for others more than herself. Once, I gave her money to buy a new watch. But I found out later that she used the money to help a friend who had just lost her mother,' Ben said.
'We could understand each other well. We could read each other's minds easily.'
Ben fell in love with her and he could not stand the thought of his loved one sleeping with other men.
So he paid the brothel $5,000 to break her contract.
But she had to leave Singapore after that, and was barred from re-entering for two years.
That was when Ben quit his job here and flew to Bangkok to marry her.
He used up his savings of about $10,000 to start a restaurant there. But it failed and closed down after 18months.
The couple lived in a one-bedroom rented apartment on the outskirts of the city, with their two children, now aged 2 and 4.
WIFE SUPPORTED FAMILY
'I was broke and had no money to return to Singapore,' Ben said. 'My wife had to work to support the family.'
She told him she was working as a beer promoter, but he found out later that she was prostituting herself just to make ends meet for the family.
'It was the worst time of my life. I felt like I was living in hell. I cried every day as I felt so useless,' he recalled.
'Being a foreigner, I couldn't get a job easily.
'After two to three months, my wife made enough money for me to get a ticket home.
'Which woman would do that? If she's someone who's just after my money, she would have just kicked me out of the house when I was down and out.'
After he returned to Singapore last year, he began living with his parents again.
During the day, he works in a construction firm and at night, he works as a security guard.
He sends $500 to $2,000 to his wife and kids every month. And he visits them every six weeks.
After the two-year ban on his wife was lifted in 2005, she and the children visited him here, as tourists.
Ben told his parents that he had fallen in love with a Thai woman and started a family with her in Bangkok.
Asked about his long-term plans, Ben replied: 'I just want to make more money and move to Bangkok to be with my wife and children.'
Report from The New Paper dated Monday 14 May 2007 :-
I gave up everything for love - Former civil servant recalls how Geylang prostitute became his wife This report inspired a reader to tell us his own love story with a Thai girl
IT may be hard to understand why he chose to give up so much for someone who sold her body for money.
He resigned from his civil service job, turned his back on a flashy lifestyle and left Singapore, just to marry the Thai national, in 2002.
He ended up jobless in Bangkok, with his wife supporting him and their two children.
Now back and working at two jobs here, Ben, 35, just wants to be with his wife, 30, who used to be a sex worker in Geylang.
His parents are still clueless about his wife's past.
Ben, who asked that his real name be withheld, fears they won't be able to live with the stigma. He told The New Paper on Sunday: 'I will never tell them. I will keep this secret as long as I am alive.'
The diploma holder was moved by the love story of Singaporean Wai Keen Weng.
Mr Wai, a 32-year-old delivery man, used up all his savings to fight for the release of his Thai fiancee, Amue Athu, a former sex worker serving a one-year jail sentence for entering Singapore illegally.
Mr Wai claimed that Amue, 24, was a victim of human trafficking and had been forced into prostitution. He is still trying to stop her from being deported, by appealing to the President.
It was their story that inspired Ben to call The New Paper on Sunday to share his own.
Like Mr Wai, who used to have a lucrative job in a family business, Ben had everything going for him.
He used to drive fancy cars and splurged on branded goods, he claimed, and dated attractive air stewardesses and professionals.
But his life changed when he met the Thai prostitute.
Ben said: 'I have tried to apply for my wife's long-term stay in Singapore but was rejected twice.
'Since she is not welcome in Singapore, I was willing to give up everything here to be with her in Bangkok.'
He quit his job, sold his car and left.
He said his relatives and friends are still puzzled over the sudden move.
Only one person, his best friend, knows the reason.
Ben's best friend, who wanted to be known only as MrLim, said: 'I was shocked when he first told me that he wanted to marry a prostitute.
'But after he explained to me why he loves her so much, I tried to understand and support him.
'He's a grown-up and I trust that he has thought about it thoroughly.'
Mr Lim, 28, a civil servant, has met Ben's wife on a few occasions. He said she came across as friendly and polite.
Ben first met his wife in a Geylang brothel in 2002. He had gone there with a group of friends.
PAID $130 A NIGHT
He was smitten by her good looks and paid $130 to spend a night with her. Then they exchanged phone numbers.
She called him later and they kept in touch by phone.
On a day she was not working, Ben took her to Sentosa.
'She wore a casual long-sleeved blouse and jeans, nothing sexy.
'Although she speaks little English, we were able to understand each other and we had a great day together,' he recalled.
He visited her a week later. And paid to have sex with her.
She had only one day off in a month. So whenever he wanted to see her, he had to go to the brothel.
Soon, Ben found himself back at the brothel every night.
But they did not have sex every night, he said. Sometimes, they just chatted throughout the night.
Unlike other women he has known, he said she cooked for him and showered him with care and love.
She would buy him shirts and plenty of essence of chicken. Ben was touched.
'She cares for others more than herself. Once, I gave her money to buy a new watch. But I found out later that she used the money to help a friend who had just lost her mother,' Ben said.
'We could understand each other well. We could read each other's minds easily.'
Ben fell in love with her and he could not stand the thought of his loved one sleeping with other men.
So he paid the brothel $5,000 to break her contract.
But she had to leave Singapore after that, and was barred from re-entering for two years.
That was when Ben quit his job here and flew to Bangkok to marry her.
He used up his savings of about $10,000 to start a restaurant there. But it failed and closed down after 18months.
The couple lived in a one-bedroom rented apartment on the outskirts of the city, with their two children, now aged 2 and 4.
WIFE SUPPORTED FAMILY
'I was broke and had no money to return to Singapore,' Ben said. 'My wife had to work to support the family.'
She told him she was working as a beer promoter, but he found out later that she was prostituting herself just to make ends meet for the family.
'It was the worst time of my life. I felt like I was living in hell. I cried every day as I felt so useless,' he recalled.
'Being a foreigner, I couldn't get a job easily.
'After two to three months, my wife made enough money for me to get a ticket home.
'Which woman would do that? If she's someone who's just after my money, she would have just kicked me out of the house when I was down and out.'
After he returned to Singapore last year, he began living with his parents again.
During the day, he works in a construction firm and at night, he works as a security guard.
He sends $500 to $2,000 to his wife and kids every month. And he visits them every six weeks.
After the two-year ban on his wife was lifted in 2005, she and the children visited him here, as tourists.
Ben told his parents that he had fallen in love with a Thai woman and started a family with her in Bangkok.
Asked about his long-term plans, Ben replied: 'I just want to make more money and move to Bangkok to be with my wife and children.'